Whoever has the most value in a relationship also has the most control and power, and in our most intimate relationships, we discover our real value. For better or worse, it all gets played out in the dark waters on the eighth house. The unspoken knowledge of why our partner needs us and why we need our partner infuses the waters of the eighth house with intense feeling. We don't like to talk about it, but it colors everything. It's an emotional understanding that acts as the basis for the whole relationship and it's never balanced. We always know who needs whom more, so we always know who's more valuable in the relationship. Whether or not the more valuable person uses the control and power their position imbues with maturity and respect determines the course of the relationship.
Photos used under Creative Commons from SayLuiiiis
No matter how valuable a person is, if they use their value to take advantage of their mate, it will lead to anger, frustration, resentment and possibly violence. Unfortunately, many of us are afraid to directly address this dynamic or talk about it because, at its core, it translates into power, control and value which are distasteful topics in relationships which are supposed to be based only on love. But romantic love belongs to the fifth house and consideration and fairness belong to the seventh house. So we float along in our eighth houses feeling these deeply emotional issues and never really dealing with them because they're just too ugly. But in Scorpio's house, it's only a matter of time. The eighth house represents death and rebirth. The feelings eventually reach a breaking point or an emotional impasse and the death will begin. The dark, underside of the relationship will be exposed. Then it must be confronted.
Those who choose to deny it, either live with feelings in their gut that brood and eat at them because they are living in a never-ending state of dying. Or, they let the death complete itself by bringing everything out into the open. Then emotional arguments and intense confrontations about the reality of the value, power and control issues in the relationships can be worked through and heal the relationship giving it a symbolic rebirth. But if the relationship is over and really dead, Scorpio's eighth-house power is fully released and all hell really breaks loose. This eventually leads to a rebirth for both people, but during the transition, everything is powerfully put out in the open. Your value in the relationship is no longer unspoken. Now it's clearly defined in writing in a divorce agreement. It's argued about, not only between you are your ex, but between attorneys and other family members. The intense feelings in the eighth house are difficult and too often swept to the side, but they never go away. Not dealing with them makes the inevitable death and rebirth cycle more dramatic than it needs to be.