Libra: Astrology's Bombshell Bra

​Whenever I find myself doubting astrology, it’s always the same sign that brings me back to my senses. All it takes is one conversation, or interview rather, with a bubbly blonde to remind me of the obvious consistencies that make studying astrology so worthwhile. After about an hour of answering questions about myself, eliciting enthused “ooohs” and “ahhs” from my conversation counterpart, I feel confident enough to ask the inevitable: “Are you a Libra?” Conversations with Libras have the same sort of unique energy as attending a Broadway musical. Bringing joy to the audience is always the primary goal. Many Libras will execute this idea with such impeccable form and flair that it will leave those who are void of Libra’s talents feeling inferior. Big fat losers in the art of conversation. And as the ultimate relationship sign, Libra must receive the same efforts they so lovingly impart on others.

This upbeat air sign excels in relationships. They love to have a significant other and love to nurture those they care for in an all-encompassing Mary Poppins kind of way. But as the astrological scale, all of this giving and taking must remain fair and balanced. And not in the Fox News sense, but in the ‘if I send you a box of chocolates, I better receive a damn thank you card’ sense. Forgetting to thank a Libra will alter the dynamic of your relationship. 

Your sweet loved one who once showered you with compliments and love letters, may stop offering to pick up your vanilla latte before your mani/pedi appointment. It could leave those they’re close with feeling like all of that affection they were once so eager to extend, was actually just a show. And most Libras would never admit this, but for many it does becomes an artificial display--a show that requires great time and effort. However, they continue to perform with sunny stamina because they expect to receive orchestra tickets to your limited run of “Libra Appreciation: The Musical” the following weekend. It is no wonder why some of the personal signs complain that Venus’ ruler makes them feel like shit.

Engaging in an intimate relationship with Libras can often feel like you’ve entered an intimate relationship with Santa Claus. My October 7th grandmother once purchased four Victoria’s Secret bombshell bras for me in one trip to the Pembroke Lakes Mall, because she cared about me and my junior high insecurities, but also because she understood the importance of feeling attractive. Rarely caught without a fresh manicure and blown out mane, Libras have a certain love and admiration for all things beautiful. Their mates are typically gorgeous in that effortless Blake Lively kind of way. I have proof in the slew of my best friend’s history of men, each a variation of Channing Tatum look-a-likes. Seriously, you should scroll through Alex’s Facebook, or any nearby Abercrombie catalogue for the same effect. But beyond superficial attraction, Libras are drawn to those who are beautiful on the inside, which I hypothesize is the reason behind their obsession with dogs, and animals in general. What’s more pure and beautiful than a golden retriever? I’ll tell you who, no one. Not even Channing Tatum.
 
With all that said, I encourage you—South Florida Astrologer blog readers, to extend your Thanksgiving tradition, and thank a Libra today. It will make their day, and they’re certainly deserving of some praise now and then.